If Marik Were Gay
by Hotaru Layla
Summary: if you ever watched Avenue Q or heard the song: if you were gay... yeah... pretty much that. Marik and Yami Marik AKA Malik in this fic are having a dicussion which turns to song... song has some things in it which cause the fic 2 be rated T...


**Yami Marik + Avenue Q= CHAOS 4 MARIK!!! HAHA! something i just couldnt resist. based off a youtube video i saw! **

**Yami Mark: FINALLY! I'M IN A FIC! by you, i mean.**

**Marik: Calm down... Malik *chuckles softly***

**Y. Marik: AND WHY IS MY NAME MALIK AND WHY AM I SINGING!!!!**

**Me: _Blame Mangafreak111 _of Youtube for the idea of using you and your light... i just liked the idea.**

**Y. Marik: and the name?**

**Me: it has 2 syllables like Nikki.**

**Marik: Who's Nikki?**

**Me: I'm not explaining it. i do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! or the song _If you were gay_ in this fic. the song belongs to Avenue Q and Avenue Q belongs to whoever made it. i also do not own the idea of using the 2 Mariks for this song... that idea belongs to _Mangafreak111 _of Youtube. gosh... i dont own anything it seems. enjoy!**

**key: **_Malik singing_

_**

* * *

**__**Oneshot:**_

_**If Marik Was Gay…**_

Marik turned the page of the bright red book he was reading. He sighed. "An afternoon alone with my favorite book: Broadway Musicals of the 1940's. No roommate to bother me. How can it get any better than this?"

Marik heard a door slam open in its usual way and he heeded the sound of his roommate's voice. His roommate was also his Yami, Malik, which he called the psycho Yami when he came back from the Shadowrealm somehow.

"Well, hi Marik!" Malik was cheery, as per usual.

"Hi, Malik," Marik deadpanned with annoyance.

"Uh, hey, Marik, you'll never guess what happened to me on the subway this morning. This guy was _smiling_ at me and _talking _to me."

Marik noticed that his friend had a tone that was all too jolly for this conversation.

Because he was interrupted, the Hikari was a bit annoyed. Thus activating sarcasm in his voice when saying-

"That's _very _interesting."

"Yeah," Malik continued, "he was being _real_ friendly. Heh. I think he was coming onto me. I think he might've thought _I _was _gay_!"

Marik cleared his throat. "So, why are you telling me this? Hm? Why should I care? I don't care. What'd you have for lunch today?"

"Well, you don't have to get all defensive-"

"I'M NOT GETTING DEFENSIVE!!!" Marik yelled. He became aware of how his "flat mate", as his friend Bakura would call it, was looking at him. He composed himself and said: "Why do I care about some gay guy you met, OK? I am trying to read."

Marik turned a page of his book again to prove a point. A point in which this authoress is still confused about. Hey, they tell me what happens, I write it. They never tell me _everything _they do… which I am actually glad of in some ways.

"Well, I didn't mean anything by it, Marik," the Yami apologized/explained, "I just feel it is something we should be able to talk about.

"Well, I do not want to talk about it, Malik, this conversation is over." Marik said so quickly that I had to ask him to repeat it when I wrote all this down

"Yeah, but, Marik…"

"OVER!"

"Well, ok, but just so you know-"

_If you were gay-_

_That'd be okay-_

_I mean, 'cause hey! I like you anyway!_

Marik growled.

_Because you see-_

_If it were meeeeee-_

_I would feel free to say-_

_That I was gay-_

_But. I'm. Not. Gay._

"Malik, please, I am trying to read." Marik went back to his book with some frustration pointed towards his Yami.

He noticed Malik was looking at him with his face so close to his, it made him feel… uncomfortable. His expression clearly showed it. So did his tone, but that also had mingling irritation too. "WHAT!"

Malik pointed at him.

_If you were queer-_

"Oh, Malik." Marik face-palmed.

_I'd still be here-_

"Malik! I am trying to read this book!"

_Year after year!_

"Malik."

_Because you're dear to me._

At this point, Malik put his arm around his friend's shoulders to emphasize his last lyric. Marik yelped and got out of the embrace. He scuttled off to another chair in their shared apartment.

_And I know that you-_

"What?"

_Would accept me too-_

"I would?"

_If I told you today-_

"_Hey guess what? I'm gay!"_

_But. I'm. Not. Gay._

_I'm happyyyyy-_

_Just being with youuuuuuu-_

"High button shoes pal Joey!"

_So, what should it matter to me-_

_What you do in bed with GUYS!_

"Malik that it WRONG!"

Malik: "No it's not!"

_If you were gayyyyyy!_

"Ugh."

_I'd shout hooray!_

"I am not listening!" Marik decided that at this point, it'd be best to leave the room. But, Malik followed him.

_And here I'd stay!_

Marik put his hands over his ears. "LA LA LA LA LA!"

_But I wouldn't get in your way!_

"AAH!" Marik ran back into the living room trying to escape his singing friend with no avail.

_You can count on meee-_

_To always beee-_

_Beside you everyday-_

_To tell you it's okay-_

_You were just born that way-_

_And as they say: "It's in your DNA!"_

_You're gayyyyyyyy!_

"I AM NOT GAY!"

"If you were gay!"

"Agh!"

Marik fell down on the couch. Exhausted and aggravated he was. Although, he should be used to this by now. His friend was always a bit messed up in the head.

* * *

**Y.M.: i hate you**

**Me:Yeah, yeah....**

**Ryou: *coughs* i think they're both gay *coughs***

**Y.M & Marik: HEY!**

**Bakura: *laughs* good one hikari!!!**

**Me: hey, who let you two in here?**

**Ryou: Uh oh, gotta go! *grabs Bakura and takes off running***

**Me: who knew being a fanfic writer was this crazy...**


End file.
